After my lovely experience at Wal-Mart earlier today, I stopped into AC Moore, a craft store also located in the Town Square Mall. I had to get some wireform mesh for my Halloween costume I'm making. I am not one for craftiness, so I don't frequent craft stores often if at all. When I do walk into that store, I'm lost, fucking clueless. I actually lost all sense of direction, didn't know what part of the store I was in. So after wandering aimlessly, I found an employee, a lovely middle-aged woman with the usual menopausal short cut with a fading box perm, who seemed normal. Now mind you, I am at a craft store. I asked her where I could find the wireform mesh. I know that it is used for sculpting and / or whatnot. I get this look like she's so glad that she could help me and knows right off hand just where this item is located. So with a friendly grin, she points her finger in some direction and tells me that "it's in the craft section"... So I was like "okay, thank you".
As I am yet again wandering aimlessly, I really start thinking about the answer I received. "It's in the craft section"... "it's in the craft section", it just kept echoing in my mind. Maybe I'm jumping the gun in thinking that this place is in fact A FUCKING CRAFT STORE. Ummm... ahhh... HELLO?!?! At this point, I am slowing suffering. It was like I had mentally stubbed my toe. You know that pain when you do, it doesn't hurt right at that second but once it hits your brain... OUCH! Followed by countless "shits" and "fucks", damning that old lady down the aisle who just doesn't and refuses to believe that the small fake autumn plants are marked down from 9.99 to 3.99, straight to hell (well, not really, but yeah).
Alas, I find what I'm looking for, but it only came in one size, I needed something just a little bit bigger. So I asked another employee, who was the "not quite hipster" kind of hipster. In the back of mind, along with all the other shit that going on, I'm thinking "nice beard, is that your first?". I don't know why, but I felt the need to explain my costume. I needed the mesh as part of the mouth on the head piece, because that is what I'll be seeing out of without my face being shown (like a mascot). Then he felt he understood, but then acted like he had a better idea. He suggested that I just cover the wire with paper mache. The last I knew, paper mache isn't quite transparent. Could be just me, I don't know? So I looked at the item in hand and said this will do and proceeded to the check out line where that crazy old lady harassing cashiers about the fake plants.
No comments:
Post a Comment